January 14, 2011

From the Desk of the Chief Mockery Officer: Use of Email Signatures

From: Jaba, Chief Mockery Officer
To: Minions
Date: January 13, 2011
Re: Use of Email Signatures

It has come to my attention that many of you are not including your contact information in your email signature. This is quite annoying. You are not of sufficient importance such that I have your phone number memorized in the event I need to call you. Also, if your title is not included in the signature, I won’t be able to determine whether it’s even worth my time to reply to your email. Therefore, I am implementing a new policy where all employees shall include an email signature with all electronic communication. Per the guidance provided by Urlesque, your signature must follow the template laid out in my electronic signature:

Chief Mockery Officer
(p) 858-699-6969
(c) 310-699-6969
(fx) 858-696-9696
(e) chiefmockeryofficer@gmail.com
(w) chiefmockeryofficer.com
(t) twitter.com/chiefmockery
(f) http://www.facebook.com/pages/Chief-Mockery-Officer/177592992274786
(b) http://www.buzzfeed.com/chiefmockeryofficer

Future author of “How I Conquered Corporate America One Minion at a Time”

“Any organization is like a septic tank. The really big chunks rise to the top.” - John Imhoff

Notice of Confidentiality: The information that is included or attached in this electronic transmission (E-Mail) may contain confidential and/or privileged information and is intended for only the person or entity to which it is addressed. Any unauthorized review, dissemination, disclosure, reproduction, distribution or other use of, or taking any action in reliance upon the contents of this information is prohibited. If you believe that you have received this message in error, please notify the sender immediately by reply transmission and delete the message without copying or disclosing it. Thank you.

Printer ink and paper cost money. Don’t print this email unless specifically requested by the Chief Mockery Officer. Also, the environment, something or other.


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