Yesterday I received a performance report on one of our recent corporate investments. How is it doing? Imagine if you will that you're in a parallel universe where the Raiders drafted JaMarcus Russell number one overall and gave him a $61 million contract, $32 million of it guaranteed. And in this parallel universe Mr. Russell didn't just kinda suck and get fat, but rather in every game during his first season he took a big fat shit in the middle of field and started rolling around in it. That's it. No throws, no rushes, not even a simple hand off to a running back. Just him defecating like a mother fucker in the middle of the field and then rolling around in all the brown, smelly shit.
I'm Jaba, an actual Vice President and self-appointed Chief Mockery Officer (CMO) of a real Fortune 500 company. I spend my work days surfing the Web for funny ass stuff and pictures of hot girls. I also harass colleagues and friends alike with ranting emails and send out CMO directives to my minions. This site is a forum for all of my CMO activities.
If you've got anything funny or interesting you would like the Chief Mockery Officer to review, email me at email@example.com. Good stuff will be posted and I'll send you some linkback love.