April 7, 2011

Our employees are dicks

bad parking job
Look what I saw yesterday at the company parking lot.  I can totally picture what happened.  Some 300 lb obese motherfucker was stuffing his face with a Danish as he entered the parking lot.  Upon seeing the open parking spot which was close to the front of the building - limiting the distance he would have to waddle and sweat to the front door - he punched on the accelerator and slammed his car into the parking spot as well as the car in front of him.  As he gasped for air, feeling his arteries pulsing at maximum capacity, he decided that it wasn't worth the effort to find another parking spot.  Well why didn't he at least back up, you ask?  Because at that exact moment, Mr. Reason Why Our Fucking Healthcare Costs Are So High realized that it was Wednesday which meant crepes were being served at the cafeteria.  No time to back up.  He needed to get his damn crepes before they run out.

If this had happened to my Porsche, there would have been YouTube footage of me chasing some wildebeest employee around our campus with my beating stick.


Amanda said...

Well it's better to have settle down... Checkout Amanda

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